In fear of the things you can’t name or destroy.

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The girl i lost it to

Was for the lack of a better word the neighborhood hump. My younger brother was playing

with a really light skinned kid and I wasn’t really paying any attention to him and his new friend

until a brown skinned girl about a head taller than him starting playing with the two boys.

She look pretty hot to me so I grabbed a clean shirt, brush my hair and teeth, checked my face

in the mirror one more time and casually walked out of my apartment. As I closed in on the trio

I notice two things. This girl had quite a bit of acne on her face and she really looked older then

me, maybe eighteen or so. Fuck!!! I thought to myself there is no way a older teen is going to

talk to a twelve year old boy. Now I was stuck outside with this situation Fuck!! As we all played

and talked I learned that the kid my brother was hanging with was this girl’s cousin. It was also

revealed that she just a few months older then me and that she liked me! Lucky me I thought

the tits and ass of eighteen year old and she likes me. Regardless of the overbite and acne I

wanted her to be my girlfriend. The first time I kissed her I knew we were going to have sex and

that made the kiss even better. When I went back to school that week I mentioned her to my

friend who lived across the street and he fucking laughed at me. According to him everyone had

a piece of her. Then the motherfucker proceeded to tell everyone in our class about me dating

her. When I got home that day I made it a point to hang with little brother and my girlfriends’

cousin to find out what was going on. Another one of her cousins informed me that the story

was true. She would fuck a guy once and leave him alone after that is what he told me. I am

either a born slut or a love sick fool because that knowledge did not bother me at all. We still

went on walks together and we still hung out on each others porch. There of course were some

snickers but fuck them this was my girlfriend. Frank was doing some work for my

girlfriends’ mother and he mentioned this girl that was cute around the age of eighteen. When I

told him that she was thirteen and my woman he at first did not believe me and was fucking

shocked when he found it was true. The first time I had sex with a girl that I can fully recall I was

standing and doing it without a condom. My first orgasim took place on a enclosed porch while

leaning against a wall. The first time I stuck my penis into a girl she must not have been moisten

enough because it hurt a little. It lasted all of two or three minutes and my boyhood gave up

the ghost. To honest mastubating felt better. My sperm sort of leaked out into her. She seemed

fustrated at me for coming too fast. We both went are seperate ways and when I got to the

bathroom to take a look at my penis. It looked absolutely the same. She called me later that

night and we talked for a hour or so. The next time we had sex it missionary style and I lasted a

lot longer. We were pounding each other so hard that her head hit the door of the apartment

and it flew open to reveal my mother on the couch. For second I thought I was fucked because

it looked as if she was looking directly at me. Lucky for me her glasses simply reflected Friday

Night Videos, a close fucking call. We only had sex those tWo time and for the life of me I can’t

remember why we broke up. My guess is we broke up because we were kids. In hindsight the

way the girl worked me she must have been damaged goods long before she ever meet me.

It is always good to meet a kindred spirit

Making your way in chicago

I’m sure if I told you this yet but I came from a poor family. Not dirt floors wood burning stove West

Virginia shoeless but poor nevertheless. I went to Catholic school but momma must

have gotten some kind of discount for being poor Christians or something because I can tell any journey

I made back in the day started with my family and I getting on a bus or “L” and by an early age I knew

the transit system like the back of my hand not only to get my younger brother and myself but to go to

places I deemed fun. Unfortunately when you use these forms of transportation you are at the whim of

the individuals who are moving you along the sitting and a captured audience for any asshole who

wishes to have fun with you. If a bus driver wanted to grab something to eat at his favorite restaurant

was on this particular route you’re just going to have wait for the driver to put in an order and get their

food. I can think of several occasions of this happening. On my way home from ST. Malachi on the

Western ave bus a crazy bum got on. I call him crazy because he was talking incoherently and he pissed

his pants while seated on the bus so crazy old fuck is an apt term. He did this in one of the front seats so

the bus driver noticed this and proceeded to curse him out for pissing on her bus in that seat. So as a

courtesy he wipe the seat of piss with one strong swipe of his hand. The lady sitting directly across from

him seemed a little upset by that. The two times my mother had her purse snatched was while she was

waiting on a bus or getting on a bus. The kid of took her purse while she was waiting on the bus actually

had a conversation with her and as she got on the bus he grabbed it from her and run. Another time she

was with a “friend” (That is code for black women which means “I am fucking this guy right now until he

gets serious or something else better comes along”) with some other useless bastard ran off with her

purse. The funny part of this story is that the purse got no money. From time immemorial my mother

has keep her money in her left tit. If you take her purse the only parting gifts you will receive is lip stick,

gum, some coins and pictures of her boys. Queer shit always seem to happen on the bus or train I was

on. My mother was taking little brother and myself to a movie when cops jumped on a bus with their

guns pointed at some older Mexican guy inside and outside the bus. I never found out what he did but it

must have been something big time to endanger a bus full innocent passengers then again they were

only mostly blacks and a few brown people. There have been times were I have actually been ashamed to

be black on a bus. Snatching gold chains was an events I had seen my share of. As a person was getting

off a bus he would grab the chain of his victim. On this one occasion a Mexican woman was on the

Pulaski ave bus going southbound and the bus was letting off passengers at the stop to board the blue

line train when some big nigga grabbed her chain. Unfortunately, the gold didn’t come off very easily

and he had to yank it really hard again so it would come off. The sad part is other niggas on the bus

(mostly women) said “She should know better than to get on a bus with gold on her neck. she should

have tucked that shit in” and some just laughed at her.

Comics tobg: why I tend to make mine marvel

If I am to be honest with myself and look at the books that have awed and inspired me

more I would have to go with Marvel. Let’s just break it down to books and characters

I enjoyed in the 80’s

Marvel

Fall of the mutants Fearful symmetry secret wars

scourge of the underworld frog Thor/body armor Thor

Avengers annual 10 Xmen annual 10

Avenger mansion invaded/fight gods of Olympus

Venom Captain America annual 8 Handbook of the marvel universe deluxe edition

The punisher miniseries #1 Beta Ray Bill New Warriors

New Mutants Cloak and Dagger Typhoid Mary John Byrne run FF

Whilce Portacio’s run on the Punisher (which got me seriously collecting comics)

Ron Lim’s run on Silver Surfer vol.3 and Captain America Excalibur Armor wars

Taskmaster Blackheart Microchip etc etc I could go on

DC

The Great Darkness saga Crisis on infinite Earths The Judas contract

Deathstroke The new Teen Titans, Nightwing A death in the family

Norm Breyfogle’s run on detective comics the killing joke Vigilante

For me Marvel has always been the best hands down winner. I will run comparisons

for the 90’s and 00’s later