A walking accident

These are two of the few accidents I had as a child. My mother told me several times

that she didn’t think I was going to live to be an adult. Asthma or injury

was going to kill me. This the same woman who told me that I was going to have

retarded kids if I made fun of retarded people. I beat her on that one.

I may already mentioned that I got hit by a light blue caddie on my sixth birthday

while I was in an foster home. If you haven’t read that blog yet GO FUCKING DO IT

That was the first accident that could have killed me but not the last.

Dumpster boy

Years after the car incident I had an adventure in an alley that fucked me up but

good. Like every red bloodied inner city boy I enjoyed my time in the various junk

yards and alleys (It wasn’t like Fat Albert but it wasn’t that far off) My brother

Raymon,d my friends and yours truly were playing behind a bar in an back alley in

a dumpster. We were actually taking turns swinging on the handle of the dumpster,

you know good old fashion fun. When my turn came this little fucking sociopath

named Eric decided it would be a good idea to push the oversized garbage can on

my head. I can still remember that head over heel feeling and seeing my feet

in the air. Next thing I know the dumpster is on top of me and my little brother

is trying to pull it off me. I can remember thinking I’m going to die and Raymond

is going to be very sad. Ironically enough Eric’s big sister did get the dumpster

off and carry me home. I recall seeing my self being carried to my house,

my mother losing it as she sees her bloodied child, a stranger who happened to be

working in his car in front of our house race me to the hospital three blocks

away. The strangest thing to me was the entire time every thing was in blue. My

mother, the car, the doctor, my own body all in blue. I had a dislocated shoulder

and a wicked fucking scar on my right temple that is very sensitive to this day.

NAIL BOY

I was out in my yard playing with my brother and my best friend from next door and

his cousin who I kinda like ( but not really.I hate him and his grandmother). we

were dicking around in our back yard because my mother wasn’t there and we couldn’t

play outside but the back yard was ok. For reasons that are not clear to me now I was

pissed about something and I stumped my left foot directly a board filled with a bunch

of ten penny nails. The minute I put my foot down I knew I had made a big fucking

mistake. Your natural reaction is to pull your body part away from the pain which hurt

as much as putting foot on the damn thing. As I crawled for the back porch I started

shaking just a little so I started calling for an adult. Uncle crack head (who was

years away from being a crack head) graciously picked my stupid ass up and brought me

inside. When he put me down it hurt like a motherfucker and I remember trying not

cry. We I looked at the bottom of my left shoe and saw the hole and tried not to

cry. When my uncle took my shoe off and I saw blood pump out my foot I cried like

a bitch. The nail had stuck the middle of my arch and it bleed rather profusely.

I can remember aunts and uncle trying to batch me up but the wound just kept

bleeding. Time for another trip to the local hospital. The Indian doctor told

me in his broken English that I may have scrapped the artery in my left foot. My

mother almost grounded me put she felt too sorry for her limping little boy

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New parents are stupid parents

Stacie and I have done silly shit in our lives but only one time was it due to being young and

dumb parents. I remember me being home alone when she came in with Noah so more then

likely she was at her mother’s in Wilmington or on the eastside of Joliet at her best friend

Maggie’s house. Back in the day Stacie would go down to her parents house at least once a

week sometimes twice a week. She would run over to Maggie’s ever time they had a get

together and sometime just for the hell of it. A lot of time I just balked at going. She knew I was

not a people person and yet she still would get pissed off I refused to go to see her mommy

who never called to see how she was doing and she needed the approval of mommy and

her best friend. Anyway………… she got home and Noah must have been hunger so she popped

him out the tit to feed. I have always been at awe how a child lovingly grabs that breast to feed.

Anyway………. She calls me to the room and says Noah has a problem latching on (sounds like

porn right?). I watch her try to feed him and he lets out a cry of frustration because he can’t

feed. We lay him down on the bed and look in his mouth and there seems to be a rash looking

batch on the roof of his mouth. We both freaked out just a little. Our first born had a fucking

rash on the roof of his mouth. We were bad parents. I called my mother because she was the

nearest thing to a medical professional. I told her about the rash in his mouth and without

really thinking about she said it was oral thrush and she told me it was like fungus in the mouth

of babies. While I was on the phone with my mother Stacie was looking into one of her baby

books. [See kids: back in the day before the internet when people wanted to get information

they would go to a book to find out things.] She found the same thing but with a nasty picture of

a baby with a bunch of yellowish white crap on his tongue. Damnit I was right we were shitty shit

parents. On the way to the hospital I wondered if they could take our kid since he had a weird

growth on his mouth. Long story short when we got in front of the doctor he took a tongue

depressor and removed a piece of fucking wet paper from the roof of his mouth and looked at

us and smiled. Then he turned around and went to show this to the nurses in the hallway to

have a fucking laugh at the expense of the dumb ass new parents. I had a seven hundred dollar

hospital bill for a piece of wet newspaper. I made sure to call my mother to let her know

everything was alright.

Want clean teeth? say this a hundred times

nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga

nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga

nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga

nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga

nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga

nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga

nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga

nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga

nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga

nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga nigga

I DIDN’T INVENT THIS BUT IT WORKS

White rappers and black serial killers

WHITE RAPPERS

Most people can only think of one good white rapper. I will not mention his name

because you already know it. I am going to talk about the one’s you may not know

about.

SAGE FRANCIS:

One of the best rappers of this era. The first I heard of him was his joint A HEALTHY

DISTRUST. Yes sometimes I even get caught sleeping in rappers but I am wide awake now.

EL P:

FANTASTIC DAMAGE was this man’s first album. I compare most new artists to this piece of

hip hop gold which may or may not be fair but it’s not my fault so many hip hop artist

are just a fucking cliché and a dance move

AESOP ROCK:

The best white rapper who has existed so far. If you don’t get the lyrics because they are

too complex or abstract it’s not Aesop Rock’s fault your mind is slow and you don’t have the ear

for it. SKELETHON may be the most accessible to the lay person.

DESPOT:

You may have never heard of this cat before but trust me when I tell you he is the real deal the

man just needs to get off his white ass and make an album. Go to youtube and listen to song “CRAP

ARTIST” or his part on the LAST HUZZAH.

HAYSTACK:

I don’t like 95% of hip hop from the south. Outside of the goodie mob, ghetto boy and outkast

it’s pretty much garbage. Haystack like most great rappers are of a higher caliber. The first

I heard of him was “CAR FULL OF WHITE BOYS” which was funny. He has come a long way since then.

MC SEARCH:

One of the first white rappers Search was part of the hip hop group 3rd Base. For the late 80’s

early 90’s his rap flow was pretty damn good. Go get the CACTUS ALBUM and compare it hip hop

now and it stands up pretty good

I would have added SLUG but apparently he has some mixed ancestry (not that there is anything wrong

with that) and this blog is for whitey.

BLACK SERIAL KILLERS

The first thing that springs to mind when you think about serial killers is some middle age white

guy attacking unsuspecting white girls and making them his plaything. I think it is down right shame

that black men aren’t getting credit due for being maniacs.

Carl Eugene Watts:

Starting killing women when he was in his late teens early twenties and wasn’t caught for eight years. He has

claimed to kill upwards of 40 women and he is a suspect in 90 murders by the police. Watts had victims in

Michigan, Texas, Tennessee and Canada. He died in 2007.

Benjamin Atkins:

Ben hated hookers so much that he decided to kill a bunch of them. In the streets of Detroit is were Mister

Atkins stalked his women. You would think a person who had claimed to have been sexual abused himself at a

young age would have some sympathy for the women of world’s oldest profession. I guess the fact that his

mother was a prossy didn’t help much.

Gerald Parker:

Parker got away with killing 5 women for nearly seventeen years until DNA evidence caught up with him. This

rapist’s play land was Orange County where a sixth victim lost her unborn infant in the process and who’s

husband was convicted of the crime and did a bid for a brutal act he didn’t do. He was in prison at the time

and confessed to being the Bedroom Basher

CHESTER TURNER:

Had been killing women from the late 80’s to the late 90’s in killer kali. Again another man was convicted

of his crimes he didn’t commit. Do feel to bad for that man because he was a rapist. Having killed 11 women

in Los Angeles he is also on trial for possibly killing four more. The man is a go getter.

MARK GOUDEAU:

This nigga was a fucking one man crime spree. Killing, raping and robbing his way through Phoenix for over a

year. He kill 1 man 8 women, 15 sex assaults and a number or robberies. The baseline killer/rapist was

eventually tracked down when a parole officer informed the Phoenix police that he matched the description of

the marauder. He was sentenced to death in 2011.

ROBERT ROZIER

This man killed white people in the name of a black supremacist leader. The former NFL player joined the

brotherhood in the early 80’s and killed 7 whites to appease the leader of the Temple of Love. After

getting caught he rats out the group that help him get off drugs and did 10 years of a 22 bid. While

being in the witness protection program Rozier did a OJ and committed crimes after he doing 10 year for

taking 7 lives. He is now doing 25 to life for writing bad checks.

The, fuck’em, dead

THE BEATINGS

By which I mean the beatings my penis took by his overzealous hormone crazed master. I’m not

sure when I discovered that my penis could be used for more than just bathroom activities. If I

had to guess I would say eleven or twelve. I had never felt guilty about playing with myself until

I actually masturbated and sperm came from my dick. The guilt made me swear that I never do

it again. That next night I did it twice and I was still horny as hell. I am not if it was the

hormones or the masturbating itself but my dreams became increasingly sexual. For the better

part of two years my dreams were wholly of a sexual nature. I watch as much porn is I could of

course but I listened to Dr. Ruth Westheimer on the radio religiously also. I can recall this one

caller who was on to inquery about anal sex between him and his girlfriend. For the next three

months it was literally all I could think about. I had never seen porn showing that particular

sexual act and I just assumed only gay men did that. It would nearly ten years until I could work

up the nerve to ask to do that to a woman. It was worth the wait

“FUCK’EM WITH GREASE

I mentioned that my older brother was a drug addict right? At the time my mother refused to

see what her oldest boy really was. But my other brother and I knew what the fuck what was

going on with this nigga. Normally he would come over high and come down eventually around

us. I fucked hated that shit. Being asked the same question a hundred times got old quick.The

stumbling around knocking shit over. I don’t know if he had athlete’s foot or something kind of

nerological disorder but he would scratch at the top of his feet until they bleed. What really put

it over the top for me was the time he came in sober and launched off in the bathroom. I

thought he was bad before this was a whole new ball game. He went off on a tangent about

making sure you “Fuck’em with grease” At first I didn’t want to know what that meant but after

you hear something so many times you can’t help but get curious. Let’s just say drugs may loosen

some inhibitions you have to screwing the same sex. Again something I could have gone without

knowing my entire self.

DEAD FATHER

My father died in Oct of 88′. My mother offered to pay my way to Tennesse but I told her I had

school to go and could not miss it. I was pretty much done with school at least in my head but I

could not fathom going to a funeral for a man I could hardly remember. I don’t go because he was a

bad man for leaving me before I was eight I just had no feelings for the man. I think my mother

was kind of proud I turned her down.

Things you should never have to do,deal with,endure

VIEWING YOUR CHILD’S CORPSE:

I’m not talking about a child you know is going to die from some kind

of cancer or weird fucked up syndrome your god was so gracious to gift

your family with. You can prepare your mind (somewhat) for such a

terrible event. I talking about parents who have to identify

their children at a morgue and have to bring fucking dental records

or inform someone what they were wearing or what birth marks they had.

GET A BACK ALLEY ABORTION:

Dirty coat hangers and half drunk medical school drop out who might ask

for a quicky to take a few buck off the price of jabbing rusty tools in

your vagina. I would hate to go back to those times because a few assholes

think it’s wrong because the bible said it was.

WATCH YOUR PARENTS GET ARRESTED:

Every time I see some kid watch his mom or dad get there stupid ass slammed

across a cop car for drugs, domestic violence or whatever stupid ass thing

stupid people do. In this digital age that picture of your mother being charged

with sucking dick in a alley will NEVER go away.

WESTBORO BAPTIST CHURCH AT A LOVED ONES FUNERAL:

IF THOSE FUCKERS SAID THAT THEY WERE GOING TO SHOW UP AND “PROTEST”

AT A FUNERAL OF SOMEONE I LOVED THEY WOULD BE MOWED DOWN IN A HAIL

OF HOT FUCKING LEAD!!! TRUST ME

LIVING THE LIFE OF A HOMELESS PERSON:

I can honestly say life is shitty for the vast majority of the world. You

add not having a roof over your head and three warm meals a day and living

just isn’t worth the bullshit of being a human. I am sure a lot of homeless

people across the world are hoping for something better around the corner.

I would just eat a bullet, jump off a bridge, or od.

FUCK PEOPLE FOR MONEY:

If it is the world’s oldest profession that means humanity have been doomed

from day one.

NO ORAL SEX:

I love “regular” sex as much as the next man or woman but if you have never had

someone treat your sex organ as if you were the ruler of the entire universe I feel

bad for you kid. You need a true expert in cunnilingus and fellatio to take you to

another of consciousness